Oooph. It has been a month of seemingly fairly random on-line and in-person purchases however by God have this stuff tickled the collective fancy of my Instagram followers. From a pressure-relieving seat-pad to a face contour wand that creates on the spot cheekbones, listed below are the bits and items that folks have gone wild for.
I imply we should always clearly go in with the sexiest merchandise: this Gel Seat Cushion “for lengthy sitting” has a particular honeycomb design that helps to unfold load and relieve stress on the decrease again, hips, sciatic nerve and – crucially – on the previous fanjita. The undercarriage. Sure, associates, I purchased a seat pad particularly to cease my thrupenny bits from going numb when writing at my desk for lengthy intervals of time.
I can hear you all now, screaming away, “you shouldn’t be sitting for that lengthy at a time anyway!”. “My Apple Watch makes me stand up and do leaping jacks each twenty minutes!!”. “GET A STANDING DESK!!!”.
Calm yourselves. If I want to sit at my desk churning out phrases till my total fanny loses all feeling then I’ll. And the brand new gel seat cushion permits me to go even longer than earlier than. What an accolade to earn!
Jesting apart, the cushion is definitely good when you have decrease again ache and discover each single workplace chair uncomfortable. It doesn’t make it really feel all mushy and squidgy, as if you’re sinking into a settee, it simply form of…helps. In a extremely forgiving manner. It additionally permits air circulation between arse and chair, which is useful, and you may decide up the cushion by its particular deal with (only a regular deal with, however I’m in QVC mode) and take it to make use of within the automotive or at The Globe theatre. (If you recognize, you recognize.)
I purchased mine from Amazon here* – it was £24.99
*denotes an ad-affiliate hyperlink. Which means that a small share is earned with each buy by means of the hyperlink.
Look, I do know that is subjective, however I’ve tried a lot of earplugs – I can nearly safely say most of them in the marketplace – and these are those which are nonetheless inside my ear come morning.
Most others are plucked out, blearily, at round 3am as a result of they’re so large that they’re about to burst by means of the wall of my ear canal, or they’re protruding an excessive amount of and stopping me from sleeping on my aspect, or they’re too inflexible and giving me ear-burn.
Earlier than this specific kind of ear plug, the very best I’d discovered had been the Alpine Sleep Delicate (sure, I’ve tried Loop and all the opposite ones that ceaselessly pop up as solutions) as a result of the mushy silicone plugs had been straightforward to drag out and in (no rolling or twisting essential), had been sufficiently small for my dainty ear canals (fairly certain most ear plugs are made to suit giants) and shaped a superb noise-seal that minimize out loud night breathing however nonetheless allowed excessive pitched noises to penetrate.
(Alarms, foxes mating, owls screeching.)
After making an attempt practically each kind of ear plug other than the bespoke ones the place you must have a mould manufactured from your ear canal (I’m simply not that dedicated) the Alpine Sleep Delicate had been the perfect. However then – then – alongside got here the Alpine SleepDeep!

These are oval and appear to simply match that bit extra snugly inside (you give them additional push together with your thumbnails they usually suction into place as if you’ve entered some form of outer area satellite tv for pc airlock) they usually additionally are available in two sizes. Which is essential. I like to recommend the small, except you’ve got a really giant head. Or giant ear canals.
As talked about, these are the one ear plugs I can put in at night time and get up nonetheless sporting within the morning. I feel that they’re fairly phenomenal.
I purchased mine here* – I purchased the combined pack with each sizes, however if you happen to simply need “small” then go for the model labelled (confusingly) “50 pack”. That appears to be the small measurement by itself.
One thing of a cheat entry, as a result of I lined this wonderful vest prime final week, however nonetheless some of the common suggestions of the month. It is a mushy, beautifully-cut vest prime that requires no underwear beneath it as a result of it has it inbuilt. I’m a convert.

You possibly can read the full rave about this top here, or purchase the Uniqlo Ribbed Bra High, £19.90 here*
Some contouring on-line is an excessive sport, with individuals altering their total bone construction and magically reshaping their noses by way of intelligent optical illusions. I can let you know that this seems spectacular on movie however completely unhinged when seen up shut in actual life, so don’t really feel as if you’re lacking a trick if you happen to’ve not but lined your total face with stripes and squiggles of darkish brown paint and buffed all of it in to a doubtful end.
What I can counsel, if you would like the aforementioned “supermodel cheekbone chisel” is a fast swipe of the e.l.f. Magnificence Wand in Contour (I exploit medium/tan) immediately beneath your actual cheekbones after which a fast mud over with a fluffy brush to mix. The sponge applicator appears to use the color in a extra forgiving manner than a stick – much less waxy, simpler to buff in – and the shades are effectively thought-out, non-orangey and stick round till you wash your face off.

It’s a great way to dip your toe into the sculpting world if you happen to don’t need to put money into a dear contour product and I like that the plastic tube packaging is properly light-weight – good for my on-the-go make-up bag.
I purchased mine at Boots and it’s additionally on-line here* – it prices £9 and is each bit nearly as good because the pricier merchandise it’s up towards.
I’ll bore you with a narrative: I’ve some actually beautiful Tiffany earrings. A gift, years in the past. Ten years? In all of that point I’ve tried and did not put on these diamond studs for various days at a time. The screw thread appears to simply tear up the insides of my piercing holes when I attempt to feed the posts by means of and I find yourself with sore, swollen lobes each time that take days to go down once more.

I made the chief determination to promote the earrings and purchase myself some “new” ones (really pre-loved, so new to me however to not the world) and this time I selected the usual “push on” backs. All effectively and good, and my ears massively recognize them, the graceful posts simply gliding on by means of, however I’ve to say that the girl within the jewellers put the concern of God into me about shedding the earrings. She was all for the screw submit for safety.
I set to some severe analysis, which took me all of about eight minutes on the practice residence from London, and got here throughout a possible answer: Lox lockable earring backs.

These intelligent backs permit the submit of the earring to enter it, however then it locks in place so as to’t slide the again off even if you happen to apply Hulk Hogan ranges of pressure. There’s simply no budging it. Marvellous! To undo, you merely squeeze the prongs collectively (a little bit fiddly however nothing too irritating) and off they slide.
To date, so superb. I’ve been wanging round with the backs, taking them on and off a couple of hundred occasions, nonetheless no signal of the LOX energy depleting.

It’s nearly a tenner for 2 units of lockable backs, which make these presumably the most costly small issues on the present market if you happen to disregard MI5-level hidden spy cameras and nano-robots and the like, however by their very nature they need to be laborious to lose and so hopefully you’d solely have to purchase them as soon as for every pair of fancy earrings…
I purchased my LOX on Amazon here* – £9.99
I didn’t need to self-promote (or did, however thought I’d go away it till the very finish!) however my most-purchased advice this month has really been my new e book, How To not be a Supermodel. I can not let you know what number of messages I get each day from individuals who have completed the e book and really feel the necessity to inform me instantly how a lot they liked it. Or from individuals who have simply began it and might’t put it down. Or who can’t cease laughing out loud in public.

Dozens and dozens of good, heart-warming messages and mini-reviews, usually with complete passages quoted again at me. It’s massively pleasurable listening to how individuals are devouring it after which shedding the e book to their family and friends as a result of they’ve banged on about it a lot!
For those who haven’t but learn it (or listened – the audiobook is out there on Audible and Spotify and all the traditional locations) then you’ll find it in your native bookshop or order on-line here*. I can promise you that if you happen to even remotely like what you learn right here on Substack then you’ll love the e book.
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